I attended an open mic last night. It was advertised on the internet as being for "lesbian, bisexual, trans, two spirit, queer and straight women of color". I read it to mean that queer women and that straight women of color were all invited to read at the open mic. I emailed the person in charge to say hi and that I'd like to have my name put on the list. She did so.
Upon getting to the open mic it didn't take me long to realize that my partner and I were really the only women not of color. We went back outdoors to read the poster for the event and sure enough, the poster said the event was for "lesbian, bisexual, queer, and trans women of color". This time it was clear that is was speaking just about women of color. Then it hit me that my name was put on the to-read list because with a name like Amari, I could easily be taken as someone of color if they didn't meet me face to face. I went back indoors and explained the misunderstanding to the director- asking to have my name taken off the to-read list as I didn't feel it was appropriate for me to be on the stage. She was very kind and asked me to keep my name on the list, just for tonight. I accepted. She then said that maybe people would think I was Native American. (I was fine admitting that I wasn't really supposed to be reading at this open mic- I was actually quite embarrassed by the misunderstanding).
It turns out that there were only 8 people who spoke. 3 of the 8 didn't belong on the stage. 1 was a man of color (but at least he fit part of the criteria). 1 was myself (but again, as a transwoman at least I fit part of the criteria). One was a straight, white, man who was unapologetic for reading first and for reading heteronormative pieces that were slightly inappropriate.
My partner talked about it and came to the conclusion that they asked me to continue to read because, as women of color, they know what it feels like to be a minority that faces challenges in this world. As such, they extended the use of their safe-space for speaking to another minority woman. Solidarity through a shared experience of discrimination and violence due to identity.
While I won't be putting my name on the list to read, I do plan to attend again. There were several other pieces that were read that were absolutely amazing and beautiful to hear. The women there were extremely nice and the feeling of the group was one of high-energy. I hope to learn from them.
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